Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner there is no god and everybody hates you.

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What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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what is green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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This is a humorous joke, you will laugh.

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If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

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why did the bananan explode? it was a grenade

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husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

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What's the difference between a single mom and a stripper? Job status.

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How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

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Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

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Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

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penisface

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Well it's really nice.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? -call the fire department

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want to go home? yea

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Three guys walk into a club, one is a fat ugly chode face bastard, the second one is a 4 foot 2 cricket champion and the third is a handsome young man.

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What happened to the man who was hit by a car? He was immediately rushed to a hospital and was reported to have a broken femur dislocated shoulder and several broken ribs. The driver was later found and was declared driving under the influence of alcoholic beverages and the victim's family sued the driver for the medical costs. The driver was arrested and was sent to a detention center for 3 months and the victim made a complete recovery.

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Why did the Jew ask for a napkin? something funny about the holocaust

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Y2K

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Why did the chicken cross the road? cause' he was annoyed with all the stereotypcial idiots who insist he crosses the road for comical value

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A owl into a bar This joke is a hoot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops