What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

you are so ugly you continuously get made fun of for it everyday and already have a savings account for plastic surgery in the near future.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What break when you talk?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Rebecca Black sings a song.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

thumb_up thumb_down +2

#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

thumb_up thumb_down

A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red violets are blue god made me pretty what happened to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the black man rob the russian guy? He didn't. He was too scared.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a guy asks another guy if he likes pepsi or coke the guy says coke and he doesnt agree so he kills him

thumb_up thumb_down -4

you are gay

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened to Alice? She fell down a big hole and broke her neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you know Helen Keller had a cat? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops