Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Your mom is so old, -just kidding. I know she died at a young age.

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What's the difference between people with aids and people with cancer? People with cancer can get into heaven

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Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

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Q: How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She shot herself in the head.

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

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Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

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if u r not my friend, like this joke

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did you know Helen Keller had a dog? neither did she.

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Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a cat? Neither did she

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knock knock Come in.

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What happened to Alice? She fell down a big hole and broke her neck.

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

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The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

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You throw nothing like your mother; she is actually really good at throwing.

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How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

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why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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