Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

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What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

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How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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A white guy and a black guy are standing in a room. Which one of them is a murderer? I don't know, there is not enough information given in the question. However, according to Bureau of Justice murder statistics over the last 30 years, the black guy is 7.6 times more likely to be a murderer than a white guy in the United States.

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Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

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lewis bedford

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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What did the pickle say to the banana? Nothing both of thiese particular things are sentiment and incapable of producing words and or thoughts. Along with a diverse enough personality to be creative enough to even think about asking a question. If you thought otherwise,GO SEE A DOCTER. Having sentiment objects talk to you is not normal.

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What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

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I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

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A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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why did the kangaroo jump? because its a kangaroo

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Why is brennan goldade such a loser? Cause he likes men

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Why was the Amish man dead? Because he fell off of his fridge, while trying to screw in a light bulb.

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69

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9:11 make a wish

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newt gingrich

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

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One night you tell your mom to make you a sandwich, the next day in school you ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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