A women walks out of a kitchen.

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What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

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A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

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Freddie Mercurys teeth

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Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

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a guys was walking down the street in Queens. a attractive young woman walked by. He was interested in here so he said nice things and they ended up going on a date. She had a big butt.

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a horse walks into a barn

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What rhymes with turtle? Rape

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

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yo mama's so fat, her medical weight chart is much steeper than those of most women her age

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one is a duck.

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a banana

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Q: Whats better than ten babies in ten trash cans? A: One baby in ten trash cans

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This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

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Gadaffi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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