go go gadget

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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hi

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

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What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

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Why was Bill Clinton such a good president? He went to ifreeclub.com

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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Knock Knock. Go away!

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What is big and white, not the moon CC

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What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

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Why couldn't the Little Boy hear his mother yelling at him? Because his mothers died

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A man is talking to his friend at work. The man asks his friend, "Did you see the game last night?" Then a plane crashes into the building and we call it 911

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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How did the fireman get the cat out of the tree? He shot it.

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Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

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Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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What do you do when you see a black man? The same thing you do when you see anybody.

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Why did the horse fall over? Because I shot it

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Slavery

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Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the sea, this captain and his crew were always in danger of being boarded by pirates from a pirate ship. One day while they were sailing, they saw that a pirate ship had sent a boarding party to try and board their ship. The crew became worried, but the Captain was calm. He bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!" The First Mate quickly got the Captain's red shirt, which the captain put on. Then he led his crew into battle against the mean pirates. Although there were some casualties among the crew, the pirates were defeated. Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending two boarding parties towards their ship. The crew was nervous, but the Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!" And once again the battle was on! The Captain and his crew fought off the boarding parties, though this time more casualties occurred. Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's events when an ensign looked at the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?" The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, explained, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the blood, so you men will continue to fight unafraid." The men sat in silence. They were amazed at the courage of such a man. As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to the Captain, their leader, for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, 'Bring me my white flag!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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