What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

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Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

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What's the diference between an African guy and a lion? Nothing. But the lion will probably eat the African guy.

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What do you call a gay drive by? a fruit rollup

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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Jack and Jill went down the hill. And were lost and burnt in hell.

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A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

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Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

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Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

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what did the duck say to the dog. quack

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Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

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As a wise man once told me... "natives."

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Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

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Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

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How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

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How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

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What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

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Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting fisted by hulk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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