Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

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you wanna hear a joke? no

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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Knock Knock. Go away!

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

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When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

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Why are mexicans such hard workers? I don't know.

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What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

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Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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What does D.N.A. stand for? Deoxyribonucleic Acid

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

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Did you hear the Joke about the Deaf kid? Neither did he.

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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Your mom is such a slut that she has herpes.

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

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Penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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