Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Well hell I don't know I thought you might.

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an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive? A:Because she is a woman A: She is blind deaf and dumb A: No seriously because she is dead.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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Du bist mein Kampf

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1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

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Im getting sick of holocaust jokes cant you Nazi Annefrankly they are dumb

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What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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Q: Whats better than ten babies in ten trash cans? A: One baby in ten trash cans

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Whats worse then a Republican? 9/11.

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Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

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Your mom is so fat she should be concerned about her increased risk of heart failure.

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God.

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Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? They do, they just choose not to compete certain years.

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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Knock Knock. F uck off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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