Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

Pencils are yellow, Grass is green OK

Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

Noah is Smart.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

What has human male genitalia? A human male

Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

penis

What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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