How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

ceiling mounted bonerss CC

A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

What is the difference between a Mac user and a PC user? The operating system that they prefer to use.

Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

Whats worse then a Republican? 9/11.

Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

Three black guys walk into a gym and play a rigorous game of basketball for an hour

A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

God.

A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

Your mom is so fat she should be concerned about her increased risk of heart failure.

Rebecca Black sings a song.

anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

Why did the White guy wanna be Black? He liked basketball.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a predator and crossing the road led it away from it's pursuer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...