I like to eat.

What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

Knock Knock Come In! Who me? Yeah. Ok.

i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

i am an idiot if you read this outloud your a dumb ass

Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

what do you call a cucumber that is wearing a dress.... an asian lady

What's longer then Kim Kardashian's Wedding? 73 days.

What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

live babies

A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

Brienna Chladek (515)556-4811. Call me;) anytime I'm a teenager:) xoxo

Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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