Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you get when you make a website to put jokes on? People repeating the same joke over and over again, and still managing to get good ratings.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

thumb_up thumb_down +20

He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the guy read anti jokes? because there funny

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock knock Nobody's home.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

did you hear about the sidewalk? its all over town.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a group of asians? China.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A scottish man having fun

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the deer say to the hunter? If you shoot me i'll die.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops