What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

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What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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I am black.

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Black Poeple

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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why did the blond cross the road? she doesnt know either

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a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

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what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

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Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

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A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

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BIG PENIS

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Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

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Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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