WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

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Half life 3 confirmed

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Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

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Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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