How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a black man flying a plane ? - a pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats worst then antijokes? the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops