why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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So, I walk into a bar and say "Why do you call this place a bar, I don't see any bars in here!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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Roses are red Im adopted

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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Dumb

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

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Wanna hear a joke? It's here somewhere You looked :D There ain't jokes on Antijoke.com

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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