why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

like this or you will die at some point in your life

What did the book say to it's reader? What are you stupid? People who read can't hear!

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

Why do fat people commit suicide

So an Alex Gedrose walks into a bar, and orders peanut butter and jelly toast on buttermilk with extra Linda on the side.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Did you know, I have a black man in my family tree? He works for a lawn service.

Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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