A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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69.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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