Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

whats gay and american? a gay american

:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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