What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? One is delicious and the other isn't good for your health.

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

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Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

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whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

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Denard Robinson

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Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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