Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops