What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

roses are red poo is poo

Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

What do you get if you cross a fairy cake with some boiled parsnips? Fladgemuffin

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

why was kade sad? he shit himself

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

What? Huh?

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

Gary: Stick your tongue out and say "I live in a pirate ship" Bruce: *sticks tongue out* "I lib inna pile of shiiit."

What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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