A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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