Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

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a man walked into a bar. the bartender asked why he was annoyed. he answered " people keep on telling this joke and I'm tired of the making me get drunk

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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why did Sallt fall off the swings? she had no arms knock knock who's there not Sally

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Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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hers a joke... japanese people

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

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A pope meets another one

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops