The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

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What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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