How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? Because they kept saying Bach bach Bach. No. Beethoven was deaf. He couldnt understand what they were saying.

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the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You are a prostitute. I have a dollar.

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Balls

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Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

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What looks like midnight and is addicted to shemale porn? Xavier Jordan! Courtesy of Mrs. Maxwells 7th period

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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