What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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What's brown an sticky Shit

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I'm called the! no i wish am I left

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

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Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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