Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

why does my face bleeding theres an axe in it

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

Knock knock... Home invasion

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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