What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Your big dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

thumb_up thumb_down +17

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops