Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

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What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

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Why are Asian people bad drivers? Coincidental cases of blurred vision.

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The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

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I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

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What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

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Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

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Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

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Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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