In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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There is a asian, mexican and a blonde boy at school. Every day they each get the same food for lunch. The asian always got noodles. The mexican a taco. the blonde boy got pb and j. They decide if they get this lunch again, they will jump off a cliff. The next day they get the same lunch and jump off a cliff. At their funeral the asian mom says " if i had known, i would have made her sushi." the mexican mom says " i would have made her a burrito." The blonde's dad say "hey don't look at me, he makes his own lunch."

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

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cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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There was a chicken. It squarked.

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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Read a Book.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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"Knock knock" Come in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops