Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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A blonde, a Jew, and a black man all went to the store. They each bought their groceries and went home to enjoy the rest of their day with their families.

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

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why are anti-jokes so funny? Because you are expecting them to encompass one idea of irony, but instead sometimes give a logical explanation to the question.

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Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

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How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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