Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

Who's cooler than Ellie?? Turtleman hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

The other day I went to the holocaust museum and it was horrible No air conditioning or cold drinks

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...