Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

NEVER

Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

Joker: Why so serious Man: My mom and dad just got hit by a car, and you just stabbed my friend in the face with a pencil. Joker: Oh well im sorry to hear that.

the economy.

What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

i like it in the mouth

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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