what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

what did the anorexic girl eat today? nothing..

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

what did the cat say to the potato? meow

How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

So a man walks into a bar and gets drunk.

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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