How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

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What rhymes with milk...milf

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Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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How do you stop an African outlaw who uses child soldiers? Angelina Jolie

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

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A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your grandpa's dead So are you.

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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I viewed the terms of service and did not agree to them.

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What do you call a black man? Rob

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

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what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops