Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's black and white and red all over? Half of a zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

My cat just died.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats worse than failing your maths test?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops