So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

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What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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