Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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What did the gay black man say after JFK was shot? Wow thats really sad but I have such an appetite right now so i should probably go to eat.

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

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What do you get when you mix Jabba the Hut with a hen? nothing, genetically they are unable to reproduce due to the disproportionate number of chromosomes and DNA

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops