Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

"Knock knock..." "come in"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A russian gives away vodka.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's do you call a prostitute in a hospital? A concerned parent.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

thumb_up thumb_down -21

among liedbtt is my Captcha code

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

thumb_up thumb_down -21

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops