See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly sent out because he is under the age of 21.

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The trick to making a good anti joke is having anticlimactic ending.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

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THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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What's funnier than New York City? ADAM STOCK! By Logan in South Dakota

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Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

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Your mama sucks so much dick, it's not funny.

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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