Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

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Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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Why did Bob the Builder die? I threw a fridge at him

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What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

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Q: How did the hispanic youth express his irrational fear of snakes when he watched, "Snakes: The Life of These Tranquil Creatures"? A: He screamed and burst into an uncontrollable bout of agitating laughter invoked by his natural uneasiness at having witnessed something very disturbing indeed.

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Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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