What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

What is better than life? Nothing.

Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

My mom

why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy mushroom soup in my testicles belly Buton cheese.com ( tickle my. Nipple frog)

what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore? Because she has no arms and couldn't find a job.

why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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