How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

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What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

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Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

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What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

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What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

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Your mom is so fat, she weighs 732 kilograms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

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what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

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Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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whose a bitch? ian doyle's a bitch

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Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

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What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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