What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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One spooky halloween night, three lonely outcasts walk down a dark street, no longer begging for candy. A cold wind blows through the night air and something rustles in a nearby bush one kid walks over to the bush and picks up his dog "OH THERE YOU ARE, BUDDY!"

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Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops