Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

http://media.photobucket.com/image/whale%20penis/marcus1v0/whale_penis2.jpg

Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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