Why do fat people commit suicide

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

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Once there was a baby ostrich name Bert. He was the cutest ostrich with those big black beady eyes, fuzzy feathers and funny wobbly baby ostrich walk. I knelt down and as Bert came running towards me as if I were his ostrich father about to protect him from something dangerous. As he got within arm’s reach I punched him so hard he turned into a baby kitten. I decided that Bert was an ...insufficient name for a baby kitten so I said to the purring ball of fuzz “I shall call you Turtle” a kitten named Turtle was a very hilarious conundrum. Things went well for an hour or two and then Turtle decided to pee on my tile floors which infuriated me because everyone knows that cat pee doesn’t come out of carpet! I decided to teach Turtle a football drill called kick the cuddly baby kitten so hard he turns into a koala bear. I sat Turtle on a football tee and suddenly our eyes met and he stared at me with the cutest face a kitten has ever made I took three steps back and turned back towards him. I stared into his big baby kitten eyes and then at a running sprint kicked him as hard as I could into the wall. There was a quiet sound like that of a space shuttle taking off into outer space. As I looked to see where my kick had sent Turtle soaring through the air, I found to my surprise, Turtle had turned into a cute cuddly baby raccoon. I walked across the room and scooped up the adorable baby raccoon. A raccoon named turtle was just too absurd so I decided to give the furry ball of warmth a new and more appropriate name. I stared into his cute raccoon eyes and declared aloud, “I shall call you Dorito!” I rocked Dorito calmly back and forth in my arms until he was fast asleep. A thought then entered my head, how funny would it be to put Dorito into a chip bag? I chuckled aloud and then decided my mind was set. I pulled a chip bag out of my backpack and carefully pulled the bag open and realized I’d been scammed! Inside the bag was a single Dorito chip. I then ate my Doritos.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

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Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to Your House. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Cheese on toes

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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The guys Joke above me is funnier^.

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What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

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What did the slave say to its master? Nothing meanwhile he and his family had terminal cancer and were worked without pay for 20 years before dying fro, multiple cases of AIDS and infections within thier lungs and mouths.

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Your family tree is like a cactus, its full of pricks. ;P

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

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Where are the first Cannibals in the Bible? A. 2 Corinthians 8:1

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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