What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

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what do you call a black chef glendon

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Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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A van drives into a car.

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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What do you do when life gives you Oranges? You make lemonade and life wonders how you did it

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whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

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A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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