So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

Why was the bus company sued? For substandard national safety regulations

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

knock knock who's there? banana well that's an odd name. banana then began to break down in tears because his parents were constant drug abusers and gave him that name while they were high

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

once upon a time jess was happy this once upon a time was a very long time ago, BABADOOK !

What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

What did Robin do in between crime fighting? He had a paper route.

What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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