Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

What's Black, White, and Red all over? A Cow in a giant blender...

What's the best Anti-Joke ever? I don't know, but it's NOT this one.

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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