Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

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Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

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Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

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What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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2 sausages were in a frying pan. 1 sausage says it sure is hot in here, the other sausage says WTF a talking sausage!

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“Ok, time for bed” … is what I said to the empty living-room. It was getting late, and the internet no longer amused me. I picked up my cell phone, rooted through the couch cushions until I located the remote, and turned off the television that had been nothing but background noise for the last few hours. I made sure the front and back doors were securely locked, walked around the back of the couch, and turned off the only light. A tap on the screen of my phone created just enough light to keep from busting a toe on an errant table leg. Because my cats have an evil tendency to lie in the middle of the hallway, I aimed the small amount of light from my phone directly in front of my tired and shuffling feet. I’d only covered a small distance before I knew, from many nights of this same regimen, that I was getting close to the bedroom door. At this point my arm started the slow upward arc that would eventually illuminate the now pitch-black opening to the comfort of my room. The light emanating from my cell was quite dim, and this action had become quite rote, so my arc was about waist level before I noticed a slight variation of the familiar black of the open doorway. At that point, and in a disturbingly short amount of time, five things happened nearly simultaneously: My arm, the arm carrying the phone, continued to rise in its predetermined arc, having been an object in motion which would stay in motion. I released a small gasp and exclaimed to my husband that his sudden appearance in the dark had startled the breath from me. I remembered that my husband was at work. The light arc reached its apex on a face of protruding nail-like teeth. A face suspiciously bereft of eyes, with a gaping, oozing, bloody pit where a nose should have been. The light went out.

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What did the cannibal say after he ate the clown? I am not sure as the tragic situation occurred while the clown was hiking alone.

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A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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